brain farts.

Today, I woke up pretty late because I went to sleep at two in the morning. Why did I sleep so late? Because of this thing! It's making me obsessive over HTML [Hyper Text Mark-up Language] and CSS [Cascading Style Sheet] --oh, those? Just another language I've learned to speak. I thought I gave that up already?! Guess not. It'll always be in me because I've been doing this since middle school. Eff you, Jennifer for making the web design in me come out again. :) Well, I just changed my layout this morning, and I feel like I need to change it again. Thank goodness, Facebook doesn't allow you to style up your page -but that's why I thought it was boring? I'm just contradicting myself..

So, also today I've taken a shower, brush my teeth, changed my clothes, done laundry, separated clothes, squeezed in a little lunch, drank lots of water, had a snack and mastered six topics in College Algebra (which is for my Chemistry class) but I still have so many more to do. I've done 48 out of 215! :\ And guess what? That's only ONE class, I also have to do College Statistics.. man, I should have just payed attention in high school. Good thing I don't go out much? NO! I want to go out. Then I have driving school from six to nine; everyday we have a test. Too much work for me! And then I still have to continue doing laundry. Wanna know the sad part about the laundry? It's not even my clothes, it's my parents'. Oh, and I seem to have misplaced my graphing calculator, which I could really use right now... I need to dump and deep clean my room. I have so much damn clothes and I barely wear half of it, but I don't want to give any away?! How selfish of me :I .. and then I just have random crap that clutter up my room. Also, I still have to pack my clothes to leave. I'm leaving the 23rd.

That's the day Mr. Yeah is going to Miami to take his sister to her school. Speaking of him, what's up with his statuses? What did he sacrifice? Or do or whatever? I mean, he seems so sad because he did something for the one he loves? And what could that be? I mean, his status talks about him being lied to and cheated on.. funny how he's a hypocrite to that, because he's out doing the same thing. Tsk tsk.

Speaking of hypocrisy, there are a lot of hypocrites out there! Including me. Now, I don't think I am so much a hypocrite when it comes to talking about people, but I sure am a hypocrite when it comes to love. I go and tell all these heart broken people to let go of there bullshit-ass relationship; and look at me, I'm still thinking about mine! And as for people's hypocrisy I am talking about.. it's just weird from transitioning from talking shit then being okay with the person they just talked shit about. Well, actually, I think everyone has done that, so I shouldn't be saying anything. I don't know. Oh, in my last math session Timmy Trees video-chatted with me but I didn't turn on my video because I look a stressed mess, with a big tee hair in a messy bun wrapped up! Ha! But he just wanted to say hi, so that was okay. He made a funny face, it was cute.

So, today Dupree asked me, if my parents would dislike me marrying a black guy. Yes, they would- just a little. Why? Because my parents (more of my dad) are a little prejudice. I hate it, I really do. The media portrays black people to be ignorant and this&that and that they do bad things. So the fuck what? Not every black person is like that; I will always stand by my word. My 'black' friends, aren't black to me, they're my friends. And FYI, no, they don't wear their pants sagging below their pants. No, they don't go out committing crime. No, they are not sloppy muthafuckas who don't have respect! --And don't judge what I listen to with my type. Please, don't bring race into this. But you can't help it, right? Because you know my hip hop ..rap/ free-styling is being spit by a black person, right? Is that it? I'm listening to Drake, Kid Cudi, and Lil Wayne. --I admit, some of their lyrics are a little profane-- but they're still good and catchy; sometimes the meaning of the song can be amazing, others not so much, but it's still catchy-- So, I'm blasting 'joints', my music is blaring the speakers and then my dad is like "what are you listening too?!" and I'm like "this." and he's like "when you go to college, you know your roommate doesn't like black music. and she's Indian." and I was like hold up, what?! Okay, one, yes she is Indian; so, I understand me and my roommate don't technically have anything in common besides our studies and academics but that's not going to stop me from listening to my 'joints' :]

Sorry. And yes, even if I'm going to a majority white people school, I'm still going to be listening to this, and I'm still going to have more interest in black guys. But why do we have to label people by colors? It's just my nature.. I think. But you know, I've grown accustomed to liking them, or whatever.

But as for change, I see a whole lot of that for this ending year.
Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, ..all of that.
First, I want to do something with my hair. Everyone of my 'friends' are telling me I shouldn't cut it, I originally wanted to it be short like Keri Hilson, or an angled bob like Victoria Beckham. They told me they either wouldn't talk to me anymore, or be friends with me. I think that's funny. And I want to change the color, I'm sure by the end of the year, the Victoria or Keri cut would have all my natural hair color. But if I do decide to leave it long, do I want to die it a color close to my natural hair color or some kind of brown/ blonde? I mean, if I die close to my natural hair color, I will have hair that looks like every other Asian girl. If I die my hair brown/ blonde, I will like the rest of the Asian girls. And, I'm really not trying to look like them... also, I was thinking about the black and blonde like Keri, but I don't know, it would depend on the style I get.
As for my weight, most definitely I plan on losing weight ..a lot of it; Because I need to. I need to be toned and thin because that's how my body was supposed to be. I wasn't supposed to be 'thick' or else I wouldn't have all these stretch marks and cellulite, but then again, it is all my fault.
And as for my acne, it's going away, I have scars all over, but nothing a little makeup couldn't cover. But yes, I do still have a few pimples here and there, but the rest are slowly disappearing me, and it makes me feel great!
And when it comes down to my mentally, whoever knows about my future dreams and goals, should already where my mind is headed! :] Everything else.. can be done over time.

Now, I would love to stay and ramble on, but I have a long, busy day tomorrow. I kind of love the productivity. It makes me feel good and accomplished. :]